Joe E. Lewis Quotes

Welcome to the world of wit and wisdom as articulated by the legendary Joe E. Lewis. With a career spanning the early to mid-20th century, Joe E. Lewis left an indelible mark on the realms of comedy, entertainment, and quotable phrases. Known for his sharp tongue and quick wit, Lewis was a master of the comedic craft, charming audiences with his clever observations and humorous anecdotes. From the stages of vaudeville to the bright lights of Hollywood, his words continue to resonate, offering timeless insights into the human experience.

As you delve into the collection of Joe E. Lewis quotes gathered here, prepare to be delighted and entertained by his unique perspective on life, love, laughter, and everything in between. Whether you’re seeking a dash of humor to brighten your day or a nugget of wisdom to ponder, Lewis’s words offer a delightful blend of both. So, without further ado, let us explore the pearls of wisdom and pearls of laughter that Joe E. Lewis has bestowed upon us.

You only live once – but if you work it right, once is enough. Joe E. Lewis

I drink to forget I drink. Joe E. Lewis

I’m still chasing girls. I don’t remember what for, but I’m still chasing them. Joe E. Lewis

It doesn’t matter whether you are rich or poor – as long as you’ve got money. Joe E. Lewis

Show me a friend in need and I’ll show you a pest. Joe E. Lewis

I don’t like money actually, but it quiets the nerves. Joe E. Lewis

I told my doctor I get very tired when I go on a diet, so he gave me pep pills. Know what happened? I ate faster. Joe E. Lewis

There’s only one thing money won’t buy, and that is poverty. Joe E. Lewis

I play in the low 80s. If it’s any hotter than that, I won’t play. Joe E. Lewis

We can afford almost any mistake once. Joe E. Lewis

If you want to make a dangerous man your friend, let him do you a favor. Joe E. Lewis

You are only young once, and if you work it right, once is enough. Joe E. Lewis

They had me on the operating table all day. They looked into my stomach, my gall bladder, they examined everything inside of me. Know what they decided? I need glasses. Joe E. Lewis

I distrust camels, and anyone else who can go a week without a drink. Joe E. Lewis

I’ve been on such a losing streak that if I had been around I would have taken General Custer and given points. Joe E. Lewis

It pays to get drunk with the best people. Joe E. Lewis

The way taxes are, you might as well marry for love. Joe E. Lewis

I always wake up at the crack of ice. Joe E. Lewis

Show me a man with very little money and I will show you a bum. Joe E. Lewis

I don’t drink any more than the man next to me, and the man next to me is Dean Martin. Joe E. Lewis

Show me a man with both feet on the ground and I’ll show you a man who can’t get his pants on. Joe E. Lewis

I would take a bomb, but I can’t stand the noise. Joe E. Lewis

Whenever someone asks me if I want water with my Scotch, I say I’m thirsty, not dirty. Joe E. Lewis

A man is never drunk if he can lay on the floor without holding on. Joe E. Lewis

Adlai Stevenson has a genius for saying the right thing, at the right time, to the wrong people. Joe E. Lewis

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